Eat the cookie when it’s fresh.

There comes a time when you just realize you don’t very much like a person anymore. And funny how that can happen, when you can recall a time when you were so fascinated and infatuated with that very same person, you just could not wait until you heard from them, until they sent you an e-mail, the very sight of their name in the “from” box made you feel a great anticipation (or worry).
Ah well, such is time, …after 5 years approximately of having my profile on various web dating sites this week I finally suspended the bulk of them, having temporarily “given up”…or rather gotten tired of the whole “run around”…the not really knowing if what that someone is saying is really true, or even if that someone is the someone you think they are. Although my policy was always to use those sites as introductory measures only, agreeing to meet the person with whom a mutual interest was struck as soon as possible, to forestall these very same concerns. And I did meet a good number of people, both through on-line and other services. So I made an effort to meet people. I just got mixed up with the wrong ones, got hung up on those who just didn’t “dig me” as much and I suppose there were those who “dug me” for whom I did not feel a mutual interest. So there it is. Now, at 40 I’ve come to realize I may just end up eternally single and childless and without a nuclear family beyond my first, however that’s ok. There’s lots I still want to do and there is still hope of love. I’ve not given up on that. I know I have the capacity to give and receive love.
Of late I’ve been thinking a lot about the loves lost, wondering if I could have done anything differently. …but no, I could not. Today (with benefit of hindsight) likely I would not have made the choice to be with those same people at all, passing them by altogether realizing they just weren’t right for me. They just didn’t treat me right. Here are the lessons I’ve had to learn, am still learning

To love myself
To not give to those who give nothing in return
To not chase after men who simply don’t deserve me to begin with
To value myself to a higher degree so that others will also

life detours

unexpected changes in our daily routines, such as that caused by transit strikes in major cities can bring a fresh outlook - what if i take the time to enjoy the new scenery instead of being put off so much by the disruption to my daily routine?

perhaps a good metaphor for life changes -
as John Lennon sang

"life is what happens when you're busy making other plans"



"turn and face the strain" - David Bowie

Fodder for the fire

All week long i've been watching the DaVinci Code precursors on A&E and am delighted at all the information i can now go and investigate...the gnostic gospels for one.

Although i'm more about "fact" than fiction, i also realize we only know what we know and we all know it's the winners who write the books of history (whose quote is that one?).

Controversy is always interesting in the conversation it stirs....kinda reminds me of when Madonna stirred the papal pot back in the '80's...no disrespect at all toward the truly religious, i'm more of a fence-sitter, with my finger in the pot of many spiritual belief systems,...my interest in astrology and pagan rites which pre-date Christianity would cause some fundamentalists and those of Orthodoxy to cringe...i do apologize..i do not mean to offend anyone's belief system...we all have the right in a democratic society to honour whichever God appeals... for many it's sadly the material and homocentric mainly...i.e. man-based and physically rooted...i suppose my wish to "believe" is to transcend the earth...perhaps pie-in-the-sky...i do not know

many quotes would fit nicely here now (mainly Buddhist i feel), in any case, here's where my mind and fingers wandered this morning:

"You can't do anything about the length of your life (i would suggest you can)
however you can do something about it's width and it's depth."
- Shira Tehrani (from Rochelle's website)


EW review: 'Da Vinci' is no masterpiece
Movie suffers from an overdose of dull
By Owen Gleiberman
Entertainment Weekly
Friday, May 19, 2006; Posted: 3:59 a.m. EDT (07:59 GMT)
Editor's Note: Spoilers ahead. Anyone who hasn't read the book -- or would rather not know details from the movie -- stop reading now.

DaVinci Code review


faith
Faith makes the discords of the present the harmonies of the future.

-Robert Collyer (1823-1912)
Just as we have faith that the sun is behind the clouds on a rainy day, we can have faith that whatever problems seems to be presenting themselves at the moment will be resolved. And they will. When we don't know what to do - we can always have faith.

-Lissa Coffey

letting it go

When we are self-conscious we worry that others are judging us harshly. An insensitive word or inconsiderate gesture could make us wonder what we did to deserve such treatment. If we are questioning the value of our efforts, we may react to people in a hypersensitive way. Choosing to live and abide by our own set of standards and values can help us take what others say less personally. If we find ourselves comparing to others, let us examine our goals to ensure they are realistic. Reaffirming our commitment to our aspirations today can help us ignore what people around us are saying and doing while concentrating on making sure that we are growing and evolving as peole.

Letting go of our need to please everyone and measure up to their standards can help us avoid being hypersensitive. When we feel an intense desire to be accepted, we can be easily hurt because we worry about how others perceive us and fear being labeled inadequate. When we can understand that there will always be people who like us as well as people who dislike us, it will be easier for us to focus on living up to our own values. We will be able to interact with people without taking their words or deeds personally because we know who we are. When we judge ourselves based on our own standards we will feel good about our choices.

this horoscope taken from Om.com for today's (May 12th) Scorpio reading seemed a good message to share

(Ewhhhh...watch out for those who attack when discussing and who are quick to label and judge...likely they are suffering from lack of self-insight and may just be projecting)

from Brigett Walther's astrology site - history of Mother's Day

MOTHER’S DAY: A Brief History by Jodi Wells

posted here: http://www.bridgettwalther.com/

Mother's Day as we know it, celebrated the second Sunday in May, is observed as a tribute and celebration of mothers and motherhood. But did you know that early Mother's Day was mostly marked by women's peace groups? The common activity of the day was the meeting of groups of mothers from opposite sides of the American Civil War whose sons had fought or died in battle.
Mother's Day was first proclaimed in 1870 by Julia Ward Howe as a call for pacifism and disarmament by women united in what she called a Mother's Day For Peace. Howe called for the day to be observed nationally but her attempts failed.
Then in 1908, to celebrate the work of her mother, Anna Jarvis, who fought for better sanitary conditions and reconciliation for both the Union and Confederate sides, young Anna Jarvis started her own crusade to found a memorial day for women. The first such Mother's Day was celebrated on May 10, 1908, in Grafton, West Virginia. From there, the custom caught on and eventually spread to 45 states.
The holiday was then officially declared in all states by President Woodrow Wilson in 1914.
Here is an excerpt from Julia Ward Howe's original 1870 Mother's Day Proclamation:
From the voice of a devastated Earth a voice goes up with
Our own. It says: "Disarm! Disarm!
The sword of murder is not the balance of justice."
Blood does not wipe our dishonor,
Nor violence indicate possession.
As men have often forsaken the plough and the anvil at the summons of war,
Let women now leave all that may be left of home
For a great and earnest day of counsel.
Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead.
Let them solemnly take counsel with each other as to the means Whereby the great human family can live in peace...
~ Jodi Develbiss Wells